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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28462200">Coffee with Dean</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skellyagogo/pseuds/Skellyagogo'>Skellyagogo</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Supernatural</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Romance, Angst with a Happy Ending, Comfort/Angst, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-11 00:01:09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,502</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28462200</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skellyagogo/pseuds/Skellyagogo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Coffee with Dean</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Every morning for as long as I can remember, no matter where we were, Dean was there with coffee.  It was something so small, so menial but it became a daily ritual with us.  Even in the darkest of times, it provided a small slice of something normal to ground us into the here and now.  A way to hold tight onto something real, when the rest of our world was falling apart around us, the death of loved ones, hunts gone wrong, every single Big Bad out there that tried taking over the world.  </p><p>Coffee was supportive, warm and an ever-present constant in our lives. There was a scary bit of time when Dean was a demon.  He was angry and hellbent on destruction, tried to kill Sam, but when his eyes fell upon my tears over him, he fled the bunker.  Surprisingly during that brief stint as a demon, I still found cups of coffee left outside my bedroom door in the bunker and outside my motel rooms when searching for him.</p><p> </p><p>I could smell the coffee brewing from underneath my comforter, it woke me from a deep sleep. I loved this time of day because I got to see a side of Dean most never did.  He was relaxed, laid-back, his voice softer, less gravely, his smile and laughter were genuine, it was the best of him and it was all mine. </p><p>I relished in this time even if he didn't feel the same way about me as I did him.  Coffee made him mine and mine alone at this time of day.  We had long and deep conversations about our lives over a hot cup. We talked about music, movies, sometimes we'd have our coffee up in the garage and he'd show me how to work on Baby, pinpointing her usual problems.</p><p> </p><p>I grabbed a sweatshirt and threw on some gym shorts and headed towards the kitchen, coffee then a workout was my plan.  He heard me shuffling my feet still sleepy down the hallway, I could hear the cups clinking as he set them down on the table.</p><p> </p><p>"Morning Sunshine," he smiled.  It wasn't just the coffee this morning, he made breakfast as well.  Pancakes, eggs, hashbrowns, and an asinine amount of bacon.  I must have had an odd expression on my face as I sat down.  "What? Can't we have some breakfast with our coffee too?"  That smirk of his was killing me, I'd need a long run and a cold shower.</p><p> </p><p>"Sorry," I laughed, "I'm just so used to the routine."</p><p> </p><p>"Felt it was time to shake it up, besides you're eating too much like Sam lately, that's not natural."  He laughed, it was enough to make a girl weak in the knees at the sound of it.  "You still like blueberry syrup on your pancakes right?  I grabbed some the other day when Sam dragged me to that farmer's market."  He went back to the counter and started grabbing what he'd cooked bringing it to the kitchen table.</p><p> </p><p>"I can't believe you remember that then again I haven't eaten pancakes since Bobby's house pre-Leviathans."  </p><p> </p><p>"Why wouldn't I remember that it was your favorite.  You ate them that way every day," he let out a throaty chuckle. "I even remember that time you spent a whole weekend picking wild blueberries and trying to make your own syrup.  Your hands  were violet blue for over a month." I stuck my tongue out at him, Bobby had been like a surrogate father to me, I practically grew up there after my parents died on a hunt.</p><p> </p><p>"This looks amazing, is there some other reason besides a shake-up?  Where's Sammy?"  I started piling up pancakes and bacon on my plate.</p><p> </p><p>"Oh, he's out running errands," a sheepish guilty look crossed his face, "besides this is our time."</p><p> </p><p>We laughed and talked long after the food ran out and the coffee was gone.  I knew our ritual was ending for the day and the serious, stoic, over-protective Dean would shortly appear.  I caught myself frowning at the thought of it.  I loved him dearly and this daily worship over a beverage we shared made me realize day after day, he'd never feel the same.  I resigned myself in the belief that I'd been friend-zoned, I was a guy's girl, you know one of those girls that guys treated and thought of as one of the guys.  I spaced out in my sadness in a self-pitying moment staring at the sun-kissed freckles on his nose, absent-minded to his hand waving in front of my face.</p><p> </p><p>"Earth to Y/n.  You alright?"  His head tilted in concern.</p><p> </p><p>"Yeah, sorry, lost in thought."   The sad smile crept across my face.</p><p> </p><p>"Must be serious for you to make that face.  Wanna talk about it?"</p><p> </p><p>"No," I faked a smile, "I'm fine.  So what's on your agenda for today?"</p><p> </p><p>"Since there's no case, I thought I'd go out..."</p><p> </p><p>"Oh, I see, well I guess I'll head to the gym then."  I got up and put my dishes in the sink and jogged down the hallway to the gym.  </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>I loved him so much it hurt, I don't know why I kept torturing myself.  Guess it's time to get over it and move on.  I popped my earbuds in and jumped on the treadmill losing myself in the songs shuffling through my playlist.  I lost track of time, got into a zone running on the treadmill, every time I thought about Dean, I'd make myself run more, trying to exhaust the thoughts from my mind when I felt a hand grab my shoulder.  I could tell by the grip and placement of the fingers that it was Sam. He pulled the earbuds out and turned off the machine while flashing a mischievous smile.  </p><p> </p><p>"I've been looking all over for you, Dean needs help with something, you game?"</p><p> </p><p>"Sure, you guys find a hunt?" Wiping the sweat off my face with my sleeve.</p><p> </p><p>"No, something else.  Anyway, go shower, get dressed, and meet him at this address."  He handed me a piece of paper.  I arched my eye at Sam and he just grinned shrugging his shoulders.  "Take Baby when you go, Cas took him to the address already."</p><p> </p><p>
  
</p><p> </p><p>It wasn't uncommon to jet off somewhere with the Boys like this, so I didn't think much of it.  I showered, grabbed something comfy, and headed to the garage.  Besides Sam, I was the only other person Dean trusted to get behind the wheel of Baby.  I plugged the address into the GPS on my phone and drove off.  I ended up a few towns over in front of a vintage, old fashioned ice cream parlor.  Dean was sitting at a little bistro table outside with a big smile on his face when he saw me get out of Baby.</p><p> </p><p>"Bout time."  Ugh, that million-watt smile and those sparkling green eyes.  "Take a seat, I'll be right back."  I sat down in the chair he had pointed to watching his ass in those tight jeans as he went into the shop.  Oh my god, I needed to get over this man, but it was impossible.  A few minutes later he came out with two double scope cones, handing me one as he sat down licking what had melted on his hand.</p><p> </p><p>"You know when I said I was going out later, you didn't let me finish before you took off on me."  I took a lick of ice cream to cover the shame that was invading my face but was surprised to taste coffee ice cream.  A happily satisfied moan sounded in my throat. </p><p> </p><p>"Sorry, I figured you were heading to the bar or strip club or something."  His eyes glinting in the autumn sun, like two emeralds.</p><p> </p><p>"Not today, I was going to ask you to hang out, but you bolted on me."  Time to be truthful I guess, it's the only way I'll get over him.</p><p> </p><p>"Coffee time was over and my Dean was going to disappear."</p><p> </p><p>"Your Dean?"  A smug look appeared on his face. </p><p> </p><p>
  
</p><p> </p><p>"Yeah, MY Dean.  The laid-back, carefree, normal, no hunting, no stress, happy Dean."</p><p> </p><p>"Oh and that Dean only happens at coffee time?"  Curiosity flashed across his face.</p><p> </p><p>"Yup, it's the only time I see that Dean, the rest of the day you wear the weight of the world on your shoulders, moody, angry, stressed out."</p><p> </p><p>"You notice that do you?"  He frowned.</p><p> </p><p>"Always have. It's been that way for as long as we've known each other."  We sat in silence for awhile eating our ice cream, listening to the sounds of the town around us.  He looked like he was having an internal struggling with himself, when he finally spoke, his voice was softer.</p><p> </p><p>"You like the ice cream?"</p><p> </p><p>"One of the best coffee ice creams I've had in a while actually."  A gentle smile flashed on my face.</p><p> </p><p>"Y/n, do you ever think about dating?"  He looked a little sad.</p><p> </p><p>"Hunting doesn't leave much time for that and I'm not much of a 'fuck em and leave em' type."  I sighed.</p><p> </p><p>"So you haven't found anyone you're into?"</p><p> </p><p>"I thought I had, but he doesn't think of me like that." I couldn't help but frown.</p><p> </p><p>"How do you know?  Have you told him?"</p><p> </p><p>I laughed, "I wouldn't even know how to begin, I guess I'm too afraid of the rejection."</p><p> </p><p>"But how do you know he'd reject you?" Damn, he had Cas' worried head tilt down pat.</p><p> </p><p>"I don't...but if he felt the same wouldn't he have made a move?  Why does it have to be up to me?"</p><p> </p><p>"Maybe he's afraid of rejection too."  He sighed staring off at the cars passing by.</p><p> </p><p>"Doubt it, I don't think anyone in the history of existence has ever said no to this guy.  He's gorgeous, intelligent, good with his hands, can make anything out of scrap parts, he'd sacrifice himself for those he loves, he's imperfectly perfect, deserves the world and doesn't know I exist."  </p><p> </p><p>"Sounds like you really like this guy." </p><p> </p><p>"As I said, he doesn't think of me that way."</p><p> </p><p>"What if he did but he's too chicken to say anything?"  He wasn't looking at me but then again I was too busy staring at my hands to notice.</p><p> </p><p>"Then I guess we're both stupid and helpless."  We went quite on each other again, ten minutes had passed before he spoke again.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>"There's a park over there, let's go for a walk and you can tell me more about this idiot who doesn't see you."  We strolled through the park side by side, he linked his arm through mine.  </p><p>The leaves were beautiful rusty colors, browns, reds, a few specks of yellow here and there, cool crisp fall breeze and the warmth of the autumn sun.  Around the first bend of the trail, we came across a coffee cart, Dean's face lit up, he let my arm go and walked over.</p><p> </p><p>"One large black coffee and one large french vanilla cappuccino, please."  He stepped to the side of the cart waiting for our order.  "So come on Y/n, what's this douche bag really like?  Tall, short, balding, tattooed, what?" I laughed oblivious to what was going on, too busy pitying myself.  </p><p> </p><p>"He's tallish, great hair, especially when he first wakes up in the morning poking out all over the place like a hedgehog." </p><p> </p><p>"And how do you know what he looks like in the morning?"  He wiggled his eyebrows and smiled. </p><p> </p><p>"I went hunting with him a couple of times.  Gorgeous eyes,  a smile that makes you weak in the knees.  He reads books by Vonnegut and Kerouac when he thinks no one is looking."  Dean handed me my cappuccino and we kept walking through the park.  "There was a short time there when he went through some dark shit and was kind of a dick to everyone around him, but never to me which is surprising since he hadn't paid me much attention beforehand. Ooh, he's got a fantastic laugh, he's a little cocky, but also sweet."</p><p> </p><p>"I don't like him, sounds like he needs to be punched in the throat."</p><p> </p><p>"Doesn't matter anyway Dean, I've been friend-zoned.  I didn't really believe that guys would do that, I mean I know chicks do that all the time, but guys?" I groaned.</p><p> </p><p>"Okay, but what if he finally saw you?  What if one night he woke up and realized he loved you and needed you and that he'd been denying it all this time?"</p><p> </p><p>"It'd be nice, but there's nothing special about me."</p><p> </p><p>"You don't think so?"  He looked upset.</p><p> </p><p>"As a hunter yeah I guess, but a woman, no.  I'm average, I blend into the crowd. Even Bathazaar and Gabe won't flirt with me and those two are notorious flirts."  We stood on a little bridge and leaned against the railing, watching the ducks swimming around in the water.</p><p> </p><p>"Can I tell you a secret?"</p><p> </p><p>"Of course,"  I smiled at him, after all, I was still his friend.</p><p> </p><p>"I think I'm in love."  My face fell, my heart sunk, and I got a sickening feeling in my stomach.</p><p> </p><p>"Oh," was all I could muster out.</p><p> </p><p>"She's great, I really think you'd like her.  Beautiful smile, a laugh that makes you wanna join in even if you're mad as hell, she's always got her nose in a book, she works out a lot especially when she's frustrated, it's adorable.  Great taste in movies, even better taste in music, knows the words to every Zepplin song, could bring a man to his knees just listening to her sing."  I didn't want to see his face, I stared wistfully out at the ducks wishing I could just disappear.  My heart was shattering, I sighed feigning interest.</p><p> </p><p>"Um yeah, she sounds great."</p><p> </p><p>"Only one bad thing to say about her though, she's totally oblivious.  Confessing everything and she doesn't even notice."  He smiled at me waiting for it to click.</p><p> </p><p>"Oblivious, yeah some women are.  So when did this happen?"</p><p> </p><p>"A long time ago but like you, I thought I got friend-zoned.  I fell for her hard but never told her, was afraid of her not feeling the same.  Then one night I had a terrible nightmare that I lost her and never got the chance to tell her how I felt so I decided, rejection or not she had to know."</p><p> </p><p>"Huh, good for you,"  a tear slid down my cheek and I tried to wipe it away before he could notice, but he did.  He grabbed my hand and held onto it, he smiled like a dork.</p><p> </p><p>"She's a strange one though, she's got a major thing for coffee and defiles pancakes with blueberry syrup."  He grinned at me waiting for the words to sink in. </p><p> </p><p>"Oh....oooh, it's me!"  He pulled me in close and crushed his lips to mine.</p><p> </p><p>"It's always been you."</p><p> </p>
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